Monday, October 16, 2017

a crazy two weeks

These days, the kids have a "balanced" schedule for K-12. So, we have two-week breaks for Fall, Winter, and Spring-- and thus, a shorter Summer. We just finished our two weeks from Sept 30 thru Oct 15.  It was like the Twilight Zone, so I want to briefly record my thoughts here as a journal of sorts. 

For one thing, Zach turned 19 on Sept 30 and Daniel turned 13 on Oct 15. So, both reached milestone birthdays, causing us to have four teenage boys (young men) at the same time.  

For week 1, Zach went to Florida, starting on his 19th birthday. And while he was on vacation, we were on vacation too-- it was easy, with nothing to worry about. 

In week 2, I had a lot planned. I was speaking in Fort Wayne at a lunch and on the radio on Tuesday. I met an old friend (and  ministry friend of his) in Anderson on Wednesday AM and spoke in Richmond at Wed lunch. Wed PM, I was back home, before Kurt and I spoke to 50-60 Lutheran leaders in three breakout sessions at a regional conference on Thursday. 

Tonia and I had seen a counselor on Monday to tune up our parenting-- and our marriage with respect to our parenting. One of the good things that came from it was a decision to reset our "house rules" and to have a conversation with Zach about being "an adult" in our home. I haven't been parenting him much, but Tonia had been-- or at least, had been perceived that way by Zach. So, on Monday, we laid out our (modest) rules if he wanted to stay with us. And we told him that Tonia wouldn't parent him anymore.

I got home on Wed PM and we were talking to him about his trip to Florida and other things. And then, we found out that he had already quit his (nice) job at Aldi's. (WHAT?!) He then expressed frustration at perceptions of us controlling him. Trying to make a long story short: we reiterated that he was free to move out whenever he wanted. He left that night.

He's been back to the house a few times and everything seems cordial. We think he's looking for another job. He has some money saved up, but not much. He's couch-surfing for now. We'll see what happens over the next few weeks. 

Oh yeah...And Zach brought home a cat on Sunday evening. Uhhh. I was just able to clean up that mess today by giving away the cat to a good home. 

Anyway, pray for us. He's "a good kid" and trying to find his way. He can be impulsive and short-sighted, so who knows? Most of us do stupid stuff in this age range. Hopefully, he'll do limited damage to himself and others. Hopefully, God and others will reach him in this phase-- and he'll learn valuable life lessons. And hopefully, he'll quickly move to a life of (fervent) discipleship with Christ and being increasingly comfortable in the goodness of God's Kingdom. 


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